


Two Devils and a Sam

by Kajune



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Bad Parent Chuck, Bottom Sam, Forgiveness, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, POV Sam Winchester, Past Torture, Pending rewrite, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Recovery, Romance, Season/Series 11, Threesome - M/M/M, Top Lucifer
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-09-09
Updated: 2016-11-13
Packaged: 2018-08-14 01:59:14
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 7,130
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7994485
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kajune/pseuds/Kajune
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sam thought his life was bad enough with Lucifer around, now he has another Devil to deal with. Will he be okay?</p><p>~ Pending rewrite ~</p><p> </p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [He And Me And The Devil (Makes Three)](https://archiveofourown.org/works/7114669) by [orphan_account](https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account). 



It started off as something faint, then it gradually grew until it had form, one that constantly took shape whenever Sam was alone and not distracted by the everyday matters of a hunter. Sam refuses to tell Dean about it, doesn't let him know of the little voice whispering in his ear, alternating between giving (mildly) good advice and mocking him until he cries. No, Dean doesn't need to know about the return of a certain hallucination, one that Sam knows was the result of a hand forcing itself into his chest. It was like the contact had reawakened the being, brought it back to life after years of dormancy.

Whenever he's certain Dean isn't looking, Sam presses his thumb against the palm of his left hand, where a scar used to be, the only weapon he once had against the fiend that sought only his damnation. It doesn't work of course, there's no pain to radiate up his arm and into his mind and remind him that half of what he's seeing isn't real.

He eventually stops trying.

The hallucination continues to be nothing more than a mere hallucination, but the lack of a defense against it makes it a little worse than before. The thing claims to be an inherent part of him, something that has always belonged inside of him despite his protests. What the hallucination actually is, is a mere distortion of Sam's memories of Hell, as a prisoner of a cage meant to hold Lucifer, whose form the hallucination takes.

Hallucifer - as Sam calls it - doesn't even act like Lucifer. There is no talk about feeling betrayed or abandoned or the need to follow one's own destiny and become a part of the Apocalypse, the bringer of mankind's destruction. Of course, after Sam imprisoned the archangel, there was no reason to talk about long lost dreams and ambitions, but the hallucination acts like a different character, always cracking jokes left and right and trying to humiliate Sam in the worst and weirdest of ways. 

Since no one else can see him, Sam is left as the sole victim of his pranks, his lies and his brutal mind games. In a way, Sam is happy Hallucifer can torture no one else, and since this time round Hallucifer only aims to aggravate him and not deprive him of sleep, Sam is alright. He was in worse shape before the real Lucifer even tried to penetrate his soul, but that doesn't matter.

Sam is known to have a will of iron, if not pure steel, so long as he can provide for his friends and family, he will do it, endure all hardship. The major downside is, the return of Hallucifer has made Sam a little more uncomfortable with confronting Lucifer, and thus, he has been trying to avoid meeting him, speaking to him, such as the time Dean demanded Sam join him in trying to expel Lucifer from Castiel.

That day, when they had Lucifer trapped within a ring of holy fire, Sam kept his mouth shut. Talking would have upset him, it would have probably made Hallucifer appear, who laid quietly in some part of Sam's mind because Sam was too focused on the task at hand. They exchanged glances, the gleam of mischief behind Lucifer's eyes whenever he met Sam's was enough to send a tingle up his spine.

Then the plan failed, and Lucifer decided to be rid of them. Sam choked on nothing, felt his neck crush under an invisible force like it had when he went up against the witch Sonja. And then, Amara smashed her way in, calm yet dangerous, and after proving herself indestructible, she took Lucifer away.

Hallucifer mourned the loss for a while, blamed Sam for his irresponsibility, and even made up a song about how he had abandoned Castiel and let him become a victim to Amara's wrath. Sam didn't believe him of course, and when God showed up and Dean decided it was high time to rescue Lucifer, Sam almost, _almost_ mocked Hallucifer in his face for ever thinking he would leave anyone in Amara's clutches.

The rescue mission was a success, and now they have two primordial entities on their side, ready to fight Amara once they've formed a plan, a plan which is taking considerable time thanks to old family issues not yet resolved.

Lucifer is still mad at his father, and has chosen to play hard to get. It seems to Sam that close proximity to Lucifer also makes Hallucifer stronger, who notes that Sam begins "thinking about him a lot". Sam wants to deny that he somehow cares, he just doesn't like Lucifer using his room as a place to avoid God and touching all their personal stuff like he has the slightest permission to.

Lucifer blames it on their actions that led him to being captured by Amara, considers their blunder as a reason they should tolerate. Hallucifer totally agrees.

Now, months after the initial reawakening of the hallucination,  _and_ Lucifer's return as a constant presence in his life, Sam is a complete victim of Hallucifer's taunts, which have become increasingly perverted as of late. Sam knows the real Lucifer would never be like this, but it doesn't help his case. He's the only one with a psycho stalking him.

A psycho with the face of the Devil himself.

 


	2. Chapter 2

One day, while Sam is trying to read from a book about ancient diseases, hoping he might find his condition listed among them, Lucifer enters the library, looking as unimpressed as ever. Hallucifer snickers behind Sam, unseen by the other being.

"Sam."

Sam stiffens at the call of his name. He's still not comfortable being around Lucifer, and it's not just because of the hallucination, but because Lucifer is a dangerous foe-turned-ally who could easily switch sides and eradicate Sam only to redo the process all over again. It's something Hallucifer can't do.

It's only because he swore not to be afraid anymore that Sam remains glued to his seat. Lucifer takes the one opposite from him, mindful of the trench coat he has somehow grown attached to.

"Still haven't figured out what the plan is?"

Lucifer tries to sound light-hearted, almost like a joke, but any conversation involving God always puts bitterness in his tone. Hallucifer is different. He speaks about everything with a sickening amount of indifference.

He truly is detached from the world, compared to Lucifer.

Without looking up from the pages, Sam replies.

"It's hard to know when you won't help us think."

Lucifer shifts in his seat.

"I already did. I told you, with Gabriel and Raphael dead, and Michael unwell, we need replacements."

Screw that. Even conversations involving his less-than-fortune brothers puts Lucifer in a miserable mood, in contrast to Hallucifer, who spent all night laughing at the misfortune of the other archangels. He even made rude suggestions on how far mad had Michael gone.

Sam spent the following morning scrubbing his ears clean of the information.

"Yeah, but what? Demons, angels, witches, vamps?"

Sam very nearly looks up, and from what he sees, Hallucifer is standing behind Lucifer now, making weird faces he knows he'll never be caught doing. If it weren't for how obviously weird it would seem, Sam would have giggled a bit.

"You could say that."

"But the power difference is enormous," Sam feels he needs to point out. "and let's not forget--" He takes a peak. Lucifer is staring at a nearby wall. "the first war with the Darkness was called 'a devastating war', which means there could be a great deal of casualties."

Sam knows the conversation is inching back to Michael, and the Apocalypse, and the prized fight that could have ripped the planet in half. Lucifer very nearly frowns in contempt.

Sam pretends not to see the mock hurt gesture Hallucifer makes.

"Well, like I said, you boys have to figure it out." He sighs. "Though if dad decides to lock her away again, someone is going to have to take on the Mark."

Yeah, Sam knows. He and God have been discussing about it, behind everyone's back. Those who already took on the Mark are tainted, unable to receive it again. Sam is the only candidate left. It's not set in stone that God will lock her away, but if he does, Sam will be the key holder.

Lucifer doesn't say anything for a while, choosing to watch Sam read rather than go on his way, or be anywhere else except here. Dean is probably in the kitchen drinking, while God is doing...whatever he likes to do during time off. Very human stuff, Sam guesses.

Meanwhile, Hallucifer continues to mock the real Lucifer. He sets the trench coat on fire, dyes Lucifer's (or Castiel's) hair purple, and summons snakes to crawl up his body until they bite him. Sam doesn't react to any of it. They're old pranks, and as long as he doesn't acknowledge them, or he keeps his mind focused on something else, Hallucifer becomes weak, a tiny noise in the background.

Sam inadvertently jumps back, however, when a snake springs out from between the pages and lunges at him, teeth bare. He tumbles backwards and onto the floor, his heart thumping heavily in his chest. Lucifer, startled, gets up and walks over to his side, and seems to debate on whether to help him up or just stand there.

He chooses the latter.

Sam hastily looks around. From his original spot, Hallucifer is cackling. There are no snakes, nothing unusual and Lucifer looks completely untouched. Sam should have known, but Hallucifer is good at scaring him, since he knows Sam's weak points, including the fear of clowns. Sam takes deep breaths.

At least he didn't use clowns.

"What just happened?" Lucifer asks, voice stern.

Almost nothing doesn't make Lucifer sound unimpressed, unless he's in the mood for entertainment. God's presence makes that already a rare occurrence impossible. It's another difference between Lucifer and his fake counterpart.

"N-Nothing."

Sam can tell from the way Lucifer is looking down at him that he doesn't believe Sam one bit, but he chooses not to penetrate Sam's mind and read his thoughts, or scan his memories. Lucifer walks off, leaving Sam to gather himself on his own. Sam is almost grateful, given the alternative would've been awkward for both of them, though Hallucifer seems somewhat hurt from the lack of affection.

Sam sticks his tongue out at the retreating archangel for the sole purpose of hurting Hallucifer more.

 


	3. Chapter 3

Late at night, Sam is restless.

He had just witnessed a violent shouting match between God and Lucifer, though it was mostly Lucifer shouting at God, blaming him for his constant failure as a father and his inability to deal with his own faults and mistakes. God was mostly quiet, only speaking up occasionally, and every word he said came out calmly.

He appeared to speak only to cut through Lucifer's accusations without hearing all his son had to say.

Sam and Dean had felt something like that couldn't be allowed to continue, but it took them a while to intervene. They were both were torn between letting God hear what the all but true accusations, or stopping the raging archangel from becoming angrier. They eventually chose the latter, and pulled Lucifer away until he stormed off on his own.

God sat down at the war room table and remained quiet for hours.

Supposedly, he is still sitting there, staring at his "World's Greatest Dad" mug, which probably triggered Lucifer's outburst in the first place. Lucifer had left the bunker. Sam and Dean chose to believe he'll come back, and by now, about four hours after the argument, Sam thinks it's safe to assume that Lucifer is back.

Hopefully not as angry as before.

"You know, he probably went out to get laid."

Hallucifer unhelpfully provides, and Sam groans.

Because he can't sleep and his mind is blank, Hallucifer has the opportunity to invade his life again. Sam is keeping his back turned to him, but it's not like Hallucifer can't pop up anywhere he wants inside Sam's bedroom.

His best option is to simply avoid looking at the _thing_.

"You know, you should get laid too."

Sam drags the pillow over his head and holds it tightly. It's rather uncomfortable, but better than listening to Hallucifer's mocking. In fact, anything is better than listening to Hallucifer's mocking.

"When was the last time you hooked up? Oh yes, that waitress from the Roadhouse. Her name was Piper, right?"

Sam tries not to recall the beautiful blonde he gave his second virginity to. She was his first actual lover since Amelia, since unlike Dean, Sam found more pleasure in helping others than helping himself. Not to mention, Sam had been constantly occupied with doing just that for months with seemingly no end.

It's strange how it took a while after Amara was released for him to decide it was a good time to hook up. Of all the other chances he had, this one should have made his alarm bells go off. Sadly, it didn't, and even sadder, Dean caught him.

Which is why Sam doesn't want to remember it.

"I could help, you know?"

Flustered and annoyed, Sam throws the pillow in Hallucifer's direction, but the hallucination is no longer there. Instead, he's right in front of Sam, standing by the other side of the bed opposite from where he was, and in an instant, after flashing Sam a predatory grin, he jumps on top of Sam and pins him down.

"W-What are you doing?"

Hallucifer grins at him much like a fierce and naughty tiger. It unnerves Sam heavily. Hallucifer licks his lips in a way that reminds Sam too much of a bad porno.

"Just helping."

The response does nothing to ease Sam's worries, and what makes him tremble and feel a tremendous urge to flee, is the feeling of Hallucifer's wet lips against his own, and a tongue forcibly trying to enter his mouth. The hands holding his wrists are strong, and Sam fails to even twist them free. His legs are trapped too, though this doesn't stop him from trying to move.

Unfortunately, his struggles only seem to amuse Hallucifer and encourage him further.

Sam gasps when Hallucifer's tongue makes its way in, explores his mouth expertly until Sam is left breathless, not so much by the force of the kiss, but by the disturbingly forked tongue. Sam has never kissed anyone with a forked tongue before, and he's not proud that he now has.

Sam's legs continue to shift, twist and turn, make the hallucination be anywhere but above him, from where he makes him feel weak and vulnerable like some defenseless stray dog. It's infuriating how easily a projection from his mind can take control of him. Granted, thoughts and emotions can be overwhelming, but to be _this_ in control of him is beyond acceptable.

Sadly, Sam no longer has a way to banish Hallucifer, or make him disappear for good.

It's entirely Lucifer's fault, the reason why he's having to deal with this hallucination again. An utterly twisted version of his former torturer, hell-bent on messing with him and doing nothing else. Distractions never last, and to ask someone to remove the hallucinations doesn't seem too far-fetched, but Sam feels the need to man up enough not to go begging God or even Lucifer for help.

Hallucifer breaks the kiss to chuckle down at him, at Sam, who pants, with cheeks dark and vision blurry. He's in no way satisfied with what just transpired, and if possible, he'd like to torch this thing alive now.

"You know, I bet my true self would **love** to see you begging for his services. I bet he'd give you the full load. A kiss, a fun night in bed, and maybe even a walk on the moon, for even more hot--"

Sam gathers up all the strength he has to knock Hallucifer off of him and send him tumbling onto the floor. He doesn't pay attention to the shocked expression or the quiet groan that follows. Instantly, Sam rolls onto his side, curls himself up like a fetus, and begins focusing his mind on the most disturbing and dark thoughts he can conjure.

Soon after, he no longer feels the unwanted presence in his bedroom.

 

 


	4. Chapter 4

Sam wakes up to find God still at the war room table, though there's steam coming up from his controversial mug, so Sam assumes he took a break at some point during the night. Dean confirms as much when he encounters him in the kitchen.

"Saw him an hour ago refilling his mug with coffee."

Dean says with a mouthful of bread and ham, and neither choose to question why the Almighty God needs coffee. Sam can only assume God needs it for its soothing effects, since being yelled at by your estranged son without any support on your part would naturally hurt.

The way God took in all the insults yesterday kind of deters Sam from believing that.

He almost looked like he didn't care. Almost.

Nevertheless, Sam and Dean begin their day with a handmade breakfast and an inescapable understanding that there is a raging, evil, and dark entity roaming the Earth and even with the best ammo they could find, there is still no plan to defeat it.

The way Dean sits at his chair, shoulders tense and expression hard, informs Sam that Dean is not at all happy with their current predicament, and Sam isn't either, and yet much worse, he has a snarky hallucination messing around with him.

Reminding himself that immediately prompts Hallucifer to waltz into the room, wide grin fixed on his face and glistening eyes that promise another day of torment.

Sam sighs, before downing a mouthful of his own coffee.

* * *

Sam doesn't know what to say or feel when he does find Lucifer back inside the bunker, holed up inside one of the unoccupied bedrooms (and fortunately not Sam's room). It is harder to compose any words when Hallucifer is standing right behind him and going on about his weird fantasy that the real Lucifer wants to sleep with him.

It's outrageous, if not absolutely disgusting.

Hallucifer's treatment of Sam last night did not receive any welcoming and much less an approval, yet Hallucifer seems to think they were having a blast until Sam got scared. Sam did not get scared. He's not some teenage virgin who's just begun experiencing wet dreams.

No.

Sam is a man and a brave man that is, which is why he is not screaming his lungs off to get Hallucifer to go away. He'll just give him the silent treatment, as he stares directly at Lucifer, the real danger, from down the hall.

Lucifer had just exited the bedroom when Sam came down the steps, swear on his soul he was not looking for Lucifer, but just a little eager to read a book from his room.

Hallucifer believes otherwise, and promptly accuses him of lying.

Sam tries not to flinch.

Lucifer stares back, silently, with an unreadable expression that gives off nothing of his thoughts or feelings and that leaves Sam uncomfortable, because he wishes to know if he should run, in case Lucifer is still angry.

"Sam."

The way he says his name kind of implies he's not furious at the moment, but Sam won't put it past the archangel to change his mood spontaneously.

Hallucifer claims his counterpart is simply horny.

Sam doubts it.

He **heavily** doubts it.

Again, Hallucifer argues.

And again, Sam tries not to show signs that something is there, whispering into his ear.

"Am I making you uncomfortable, Sam?"

An honest response would be "yes", but Sam doesn't know who to blame this time round, because Lucifer's mere presence is still unnerving and Hallucifer is currently deciding to _never stop talking_.

Sam goes with a braver option.

"N-no."

His stuttering earns him a raised eyebrow, which clearly states Lucifer is by no means convinced.

Sam should really know better than to lie to the King of Lies.

Though the greater liar is the jerk standing behind him, all happy with his dirty mind.

Lucifer takes a few steps forward. "Should I leave?" He asks gently, though his expression remains blank.

"I-I-It's fine."

Sam lies, scratching the back of his neck. In truth, Sam wants to leave himself, dash out of here and be as far away as possible from these two, who are both a pain in his life. He might even join God at the table in hopes he won't be approached by either of them.

Although clearly doubtful about Sam's honesty, Lucifer doesn't prod. Instead, he lets out a small, kind smile which reminds Sam of their early days together.

When Lucifer professed only a desire to make Sam happy.

"Anything you want, Sam."

As if convinced Sam wants him out of here (which he does, in a way), Lucifer walks right up to Sam and passes him without another word. Such proximity gives Sam a minor chill, for even now, Lucifer still emits a very low temperature, which is hard to notice unless you're close enough.

Sam never wants to be close enough to feel the cold air from Lucifer's skin.

"Oh dear you do~"

"Shut up."

Sam bites back.

 


	5. Chapter 5

Dean is complaining to God now, with God's apparent stoicism doing nothing to calm Dean down. Instead, it gives the brothers a strong impression of a father who couldn't care less about his children, and Sam and Dean have suffered with one such figure already.

For Dean, it is likely more personal. God reminds Dean so much of John Winchester, and Amara has affections for Dean that are known to be irresistible. If Dean does end up succumbing to her advances, to Dean, it would feel very much like his own father had abandoned him to the hounds to be eaten, because he - the son - didn't matter enough.

For all Sam knows, Dean has been abandoned to actual human-eaters at least once before by John.

Which is one too many times.

Unfortunately, Lucifer is just watching from a distance, obscured by shadows, with a noticeable, delighted grin on his face. Sam doesn't know who is he laughing at more, Dean or God. Eventually, Sam decides he has enough of Lucifer being a pain, so he yanks Lucifer away from his hiding spot and pins him to the wall.

The entire act makes his stomach turn with disgust.

 _Not_  with butterflies, as Hallucifer assumes.

"You need to help us, now!"

Lucifer looks unimpressed with Sam's threatening tone. Indeed, it is not Sam's best, impossible under Sam's current situation. He has the actual Devil staring at him, too close for comfort, though there's been too long of inactivity for Sam to care.

"How? I am but one of four archangels necessary to win this war."

"Then forgive God so we can move on with a plan."

Sam nearly recoils from fear and shock when Lucifer turns livid from the statement.

"Me? Forgive dad? What crime have I committed that deserves that good-for-nothing _parent_ such kindness from me, his most betrayed son?"

Okay, now, maybe Sam shouldn't have forgotten how truly bad the relationship between God and Lucifer is. It's similar to John and Sam's, but ten times worse. Long years of absence, utter disagreements and a near-eternity of imprisonment simply because one didn't want to listen to the other.

Such cruelty by a parent most likely requires the parent's apology.

Not the other way round.

But Sam has seen how God will not react to anything unless acted upon, and since God is basically a lost cause, Sam's only hope is to turn to Lucifer, as stupid as that sounds.

Honestly, Sam is becoming desperate and he knows it.

Just how many people have died simply because one pair of father and son cannot reconcile?

Most likely too many, in Sam's opinion.

"Offer him sex."

A familiar voice encourages, and Sam snaps.

'Shut up!"

Sam blurts out angrily, and this leaves Lucifer utterly perplexed. Sam turns to him slowly and manages to give a rather sheepish look, and not another angry one. This does not divert Lucifer away from the absolute blunder Sam just made, instead, he looks ready to ask questions and not a 'I'll forget your blunder for the day' kind of attitude.

"Sam, who did you just speak to?"

"Nobody! I'm...only talking to you."

Sam quite hurriedly explains, and somehow, he feels like he just fell into a trap, one he built himself, and with no escape. If he and Lucifer have anything in common, it's that neither of them are idiots.

It's too obvious that Sam did something wrong.

"Say it, Sam."

Hallucifer insists.

"You see someone, Sam?"

"No!"

Sam tries to argue, but everything seems hopeless at this point.

"Say it...!"

"Will you shut up!?"

Sam shouts at the hallucination again, and this prompts Lucifer to frown and touch his forehead before Sam can stop him. A small flash of energy spreads throughout Sam's head. A second later, Lucifer's eyes lock onto Hallucifer's, and for the first time Lucifer can see this entity formerly privy to the hunter alone.

While the fake one looks amused, the real one appears mortified.

"Hello."

Hallucifer says with a wave. 

It takes a moment for Lucifer to say anything, and when he does, it's clear he feels disturbed by his discovery.

"S-Sam, who is that?"

Sam can only gulp and swear once more, that his life truly sucks.

 


	6. Chapter 6

For someone who is looking at a literal copy of himself, albeit one with a much worse personality, Lucifer is rather calm about it as opposed to how Sam expected him to react. He's wide-eyed, with a face full of shock, and he seems frozen with two fingers in mid-air, yet there is a lacking of great horror Sam's imagination considered he would express.

Maybe some level of stoicism runs in the family, Sam's mind kindly suggests.

In contrast, Hallucifer looks very amused with this new turn of events. Sam long suspected it would discomfort him, but apparently no, neither entities meet Sam's expectations, and Hallucifer probably sees his counterpart as a new playmate.

Or worse, a partner in crime.

Lucifer turns to face Sam, and he does not look pleased. Sam wishes he never got to see this abomination.

"Who is this?"

Lucifer asks again.

"He's...an illusion, a fake, caused by my memories of the cage."

Lucifer is quiet for a long moment. His eyes flicker between the two of them, and while Hallucifer continues to find this whole situation as delightful as a child finds Christmas Eve, Sam feels only dread, he fears all the many bad things that could happen right now.

Eventually, Lucifer breaks the silence.

"You had this...thing, inside your head, since the day you left?"

Sam nods, and suddenly Lucifer looks horribly sympathetic, like he never thought Sam would suffer through such an ordeal after being shredded and burnt and strangled in the cage by none other than Lucifer himself.

Maybe he merely hoped for another consequence to Sam's escape from the cage, something nicer?

Either way, a hallucination was what he got and what he still has.

Thanks again, to Lucifer.

"Sam..."

Lucifer's voice is very gentle, loving almost, and Sam wants to tear himself from the wall and walk away and never look back. He doesn't need _Sympathy from the Devil_ when both of his current problems are **caused** by the Devil.

"Oh, just fuck each other already!"

Hallucifer whines, and Lucifer switches from a sweet expression to one of pure distaste.

"What did you say?"

"You heard me, buddy, you want a piece of that human meat. We both do, and you kno--"

Lucifer turns his head away as his clear sign that he _does not walk to talk to that thing_ , and Sam is grateful.

Hallucifer huffs in annoyance.

"I'll get rid of you this instant."

Lucifer moves his fingers back towards Sam's forehead, or at least, tries to, but Hallucifer is quick and he yanks Sam away and has him pinned to the opposite wall by Hallucifer's larger than Lucifer's, yet smaller than Sam's, body.

"Ready for round two?"

Hallucifer asks, completely ignoring a flabbergasted archangel behind him as he presses his lips against Sam's and forces his way inside again. Sam is once more helpless and unable to remove the monster from him, unable to fight against said thing's inhuman strength. He can almost hear Hallucifer rumble with laughter at his misfortune.

Sam hears a snap of fingers, and suddenly he finds himself sitting on his own bed, with Lucifer standing by the door.

He looks sullen, and Sam wonders, very briefly, if that scene traumatized him somewhat.

Seeing a copy of yourself do uncharacteristic things is never a joy.

When Lucifer finally looks up at Sam, there is nothing but longing in his eyes.

"You were made for me, Sam."

_Oh Hell no._

Sam is getting the impression that Lucifer actually _wants_ to sleep with him, based on their pre-destined union which Sam already made clear he was not going to fulfill ever again. And guess what? Lucifer reacted by beating on him, repeatedly.

For such a seemingly loving angel, Lucifer sure does have a vicious temper.

He still doesn't want to remember the bloody remains of various pagan deities he saw six years ago.

Sam inches back from the archangel, but Lucifer is unfazed, he slowly takes small steps towards Sam and the bed and Sam really does not want to be here right now. God and Dean are still arguing, and neither will be able to hear his screams for help if he ever lets them out.

They didn't seem to hear him the first time, from Hell.

In addition, Hallucifer is probably going to be here any minute too, assuming he's not already watching from Sam's own mind.

"I was supposed to cherish you, yet I didn't."

"L-Lucifer, leave, me alone."

"I have Sam, for years, and all I could do was long for your company. If only I knew our reunion would turn out so badly."

Lucifer is by the foot of the bed, looking so sad and broken.

Sam doesn't want to feel sorry for him.

Never.

He didn't even bother to help Sam up yesterday, though Sam actually preferred the lack of physical contact. However, the very act of ignoring Sam only proved how heartless he is, or capable of being.

Sam really wants to bolt to the exit right now.

"You poor thing."

Sam glares at the archangel for the belittling term, but when Lucifer begins climbing onto the bed, Sam takes the chance to slip past him. Unfortunately, Lucifer is quick too, and manages to grab Sam by the wrist and pull him back onto the bed. He positions himself above Sam, in a similar fashion to Hallucifer, but without the restraint on his hands or legs.

It's a little harder with Castiel's small frame, but maybe Lucifer just doesn't want to.

"I won't forgive dad," Lucifer says. "and that's not because I hate you boys in any way, or I want Amara to win. I hate Amara, and I want her locked away like you do, but Sam...please don't ask of me the impossible." He inches his face closer to Sam, and all Sam can see is the earnest in his expression. "I love my dad, I do, I said so before, but he is a bad parent and he needs to apologize for his many mistakes. You see how he does nothing? Blames me for everything? I can't Sam, I can't forgive such obvious disregard by a parent to his child."

It comes almost as a shock that Lucifer's sob-story really touches Sam and doesn't compel him to brush the archangel off. No. Sam knows how horrible it is to be mistreated by a father, to be insulted and hated and without any proper reason other than they just choose not to agree with you, on anything.

Sam has been hurt many times by neglect, and Dean's reverence in their father cannot cover up just how bad the man is at parenting, and generally as a person.

"...I get it."

He whispers, and he really means it. Lucifer may be cruel, but Sam hasn't exactly been the good guy while under his father's care. It's not like he had much of a choice, given how John's bad behavior left a void in Sam's heart. This line of thought does encourage Sam to sympathize with Lucifer, his former torturer, but how can he not?

The two of them are so similar, that he and Lucifer are virtually one and the same.

_M.F.E.O._

What Sam has is a brother, while Lucifer never did. He lost his own big brother when the latter chose to continue worshipping their father despite the flaws, and instead, he turned against Lucifer, the sibling.

Forgiving Dean was easy since Dean had apologized in various ways, but not John. John had never apologized to Sam for his mistakes, but Sam is glad that he did give his apology to John when he and his brother time traveled to the past. He was later informed that young John's memories were wiped, but Sam still felt better for doing the right thing. Lucifer may not be able to display such courage and kindness, maybe because he never feels like his father had it hard, and honestly, God makes himself appear as a being who never suffered through hardship even once.

All he has is a sister who disagrees with him, so he locked her away, and did the same to Lucifer, and Gadreel, and maybe more. Maybe.

So Sam understands the archangel, knows the inner turmoil he is suffering with, but he needs to understand himself that he can't just stay angry and resentful. If Lucifer doesn't approach God for a proper conversation, nothing will progress.

And then, the world will end.

The existence of the Earth and everything should not rely on one's selfishness.

So Sam begs.

"Lucifer, please, you have to forgive him, or at least try and talk to him! Be nice, be patient. The world is going to end if you don't."

Lucifer seems to debate on whether to reply, to bite back with his own witty retort, but he doesn't. He holds it in, the angry words, the rejection. It means Lucifer does know for sure the consequences of his own silence.

He hates Amara, so why must he hesitate?

"But Sam....there's no guarantee..."

"Whatever you want." Sam blurts out. "Whatever it is the hell you want, I'll give it to you, but please forgive your dad, please."

Lucifer is quiet for a long moment again, as he stares, unblinking, into Sam's eyes, making Sam feel increasingly uncomfortable and increasingly uncertain about his own offer. But then again, if Lucifer is not allowed to be mad at God, then Sam shouldn't be allowed to maintain any dignity when the world is about to end, right?

Sam thinks he should discard any inhibitions if he really wants to save the planet, again.

"Can I...?"

Lucifer leans down, slowly, and his and Sam's lips touch in a gentle, experimental kiss, and all Sam can taste is ice. Just ice.

It takes a while, a few heart beats maybe, but Sam eventually feels Lucifer's tongue enter.

And finds it is not forked.

 

 


	7. Chapter 7

Sam feels like he's enjoying this, somehow, like he genuinely _wants_ the hands that glide over his body and the mouth that ravishes him like a last, delicious meal. Maybe Hallucifer was right about one thing, that Sam needs to get laid, but not specifically with Lucifer, but with anyone.

Though this is probably not the best time to bed anyone either, even if Dean is into the whole 'end of the world' thing. Sam isn't. He doesn't believe one should be reckless during times of great disaster.

However, Lucifer is here, and he wants this. For some reason, he does, and Sam will let him in, let him take off his every article of clothing and enter his body in a different way from what he once did, years ago.

Lucifer is gentle, which isn't really Sam's style, but he appreciates it. His skin is cold, but not too much. Slowly, Sam can feel himself heating up, like his insides are burning with adrenaline, so the coolness of Lucifer's skin is a welcomed thing.

Sam moans as Lucifer trails kisses down his exposed chest, the flannel shirt unbuttoned. Expertly, Lucifer unbuckles his belt and as he drags down the zipper of Sam's trousers, the hunter is briefly reminded that this is Castiel's body, that Castiel is in there and he's probably aware of what's going on, and even if he isn't, what is to say he won't find out later?

It's betrayal, Sam thinks, but he can't back out of this. He'll try to explain himself, say that Lucifer wanted him or else he'd continue to postpone their non-existent plan and end up letting the planet die.

Lucifer pulls his trousers off, tosses them to a random corner, and stares down at his work.

Sam feels flustered, hot, and hard. Dean is so going to kill him for this, and pray to any god but the one inside his home that Dean doesn't come looking for him. Unlike Castiel, Dean has no reason to know about this.

This is Sam's choice, and Sam is doing it for the world.

"Hey there, buddy."

Hallucifer materializes right behind Lucifer, and wraps his arms around the latter. Lucifer and Sam are both mortified by his intrusion, the apparent lack of decency or even the understanding of the phrase 'leave us alone' regardless of form.

The hallucination looks happy, proud even, even after Lucifer nails him in the gut with his elbow and kicks him into the wall.

Sam is impressed, but also very disturbed. He won't let the hallucination touch him, no. Lucifer was a hard enough decision to make, he doesn't need this lame copy violating him.

Hallucifer chuckles.

"Why don't we make a deal as well, Sam?"

Sam looks away, unwilling to give the other the courtesy of eye contact, meanwhile, Lucifer is glaring daggers at the fake him.

"Let me enjoy a round with you two, and I'll go. Forever."

"Lies."

Sam barks.

Hallucifer only chuckles again.

"What have you got to lose?"

Nothing, but Sam doesn't want to admit it. He doesn't, not to this fiend.

"I can get rid of you myself."

Lucifer coldly announces. Sam can see he already has two fingers ready for the act.

Hallucifer whistles.

"You sure you want to, buddy? Just imagine all the sweet fun we could have, I mean, lots and lots of it."

"Sam is mine."

The temperature of the room drops considerably, becoming cold like ice and much like Lucifer's current icy mood.

"And I'm you."

"No you're not."

"Come on, threesomes are fun!"

"I said, Sam is mine!"

Okay, Sam can see his own breath now. It's a terrifying sight, and knowing Lucifer to be an easy one to anger, Sam doesn't know if he'll live through this argument.

"Mine too."

Hallucifer reappears behind Sam, on the bed, and before Sam can look behind himself and spot the hallucination, Hallucifer grabs hold of him and begins pumping his erection, brutally hard and brutally fast.

"Ahhh!"

Sam can't hold in the sounds.

Lucifer looks livid again.

"Let him go!"

"Make me."

At that, Lucifer lunges forward and removes the invading hands from Sam's body. He forces Hallucifer off the bed with a punch to the jaw, and pulls Sam towards him, and holds the trembling hunter close.

Sam returns the embrace, simply because he doesn't want to feel exposed.

He wants to feel protected.

"Hahahaha!!"

Hallucifer cackles from his position on the floor, the very same spot Sam threw him to last night, when Hallucifer tried to violate him. Now, Sam has Lucifer to protect him, but Sam doesn't know how well Lucifer can defeat this thing. It's not real, not even supposed to be touchable, but maybe Lucifer really is capable of shredding away the remnants of the fiend from Sam's mind, given that he was the one to bring it to life.

Accidental or not, it's Lucifer's fault.

Lucifer presses two fingers to Sam's forehead, and the hallucination flickers. The image of the proud, smirking Not-Lucifer becomes distorted, but somehow, Sam feels intense pain radiating from where the fingers are pressed. It hurts, and with the sensation of having one's head being smashed against concrete, memories from the cage flood his mind.

The flashes are all too real, vivid and audible. Sam sees Michael, wearing Adam, shouting at Lucifer to stop what he's doing. Sam can see Lucifer glaring down at him, bearing the same amount of anger Lucifer is showing Hallucifer now. He's stabbing hooks into Sam's flesh and all Sam can hear from this particular, lasting memory is screaming.

He soon realizes he himself is screaming too, and he tries to stop. He manages only after Lucifer removes his fingers and looks down at him in worry.

Hallucifer cackles again.

"Hahaha! Like I said buddy, you and me are one and the same." Hallucifer rises from the floor and grins devilishly at the pair, though nothing seems to register in either. Sam is still trembling a bit, frightful over what this evil being means. "So long as you're with Sammy, I can't leave." He does a dramatic shrug. "Not that I want to, but every time you try to remove me, or reach inside Sammy's skull or his shiny little soul from which I originate, then he's just going to remember you all over again."

He crawls onto the bed until he is up in Lucifer's face.

"The you that birthed me."

The temperature of the room rushes back to normal as realization seems to dawn on Lucifer, and his expression morphs into pure horror. Sam watches with concern and confusion as Hallucifer pulls away and back onto his feet before cackling once more. Sam's too discomforted by Lucifer's expression to feel disturbed by the grating noise.

Eventually, Lucifer utters something quietly. Sam barely hears it.

"What?"

Hallucifer is eyeing him expectantly. Lucifer ignores him in favor of giving Sam the most broken expression Sam has ever seen on Castiel or Lucifer.

"Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder."

The words spark as much curiosity as it does understanding in Sam.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't know if this chapter makes any sense. I tried my best anyway.


End file.
